Dead No More

by Erin Blair

TITLE: Dead No More
AUTHOR: Erin M. Blair
CLASSIFICATION/CATEGORIES: SRA -- Story, Romance, Angst CONTENT: Mulder/Scully Romance.
DISTRIBUTION/ARCHIVE STATEMENT: OK to Gossamer, Ephemeral, After the Fact, MSR Cheerleaders Archive. Others: OK.
SPOILERS: The Blessing Way
SETTING: Season Three
DISCLAIMER: Mulder and Scully belong to Chris Carter. DATE: Completed on: August 6, 2004.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS: This story is dedicated to my writing mentor (and beta reader), Jen. SUMMARY: Mulder thinks of his life and about his budding relationship with Scully after the events in "Anasazi" and "The Blessing Way."

Dead No More
by Erin M. Blair

They have tried to silence my voice; they have tried to take the one thing that matters most to me. They have tried to break me down at every single turn, but like the Phoenix, I have risen from the dead.

They have set fire to the box car, but I'm still here. I'm barely holding on, but I can still hear her cries.

I could hear her voice calling out to me. I wished I could get out from under the rocks; unfortunately, I couldn't summon the strength that I needed.

Angels in the form of Albert Hosteen and his family saved me from death that day. Their healing ritual worked wonders on me.

Now I wonder about her.

I know I behaved badly towards her when they were trying to discredit me by drugging my water. She deserves so much more than me; I blame myself for not saving her in time on that lonely night months ago.

I knew then how much she means to me. I owe her everything. When she came into my life, I knew she was going to change my world. She had my heart -- possibly from the moment that I first saw her standing before me. My heart quickened when our hands touched the first time. Electrical currents swirled inside me that day.

And every single day since then, our eyes have looked deeply within our souls.

She has my heart.

I can visualize the pain she must be going through. I'm not there to brush away those tears from her eyes as she cries on her mother's shoulder. I'm not there when she hands her gun to Skinner. I'm not there when she finds a chip in her neck.

I'm dead no more.

Now I can take my rightful place at her side. She will be lonely no more. She will no longer have to cry for me because I'll be with her.

Forever more.

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Author's Notes

This story was inspired by one of the writing prompts at Writer's Digest for the month of June. I thought this prompt, "If someone had wanted me dead, he missed a good chance when," would be a natural for any character on the X-Files, especially Mulder when he almost died.

I always like the cosmic connection that Mulder and Scully seemed to convey in that brilliant trilogy of episodes. At the same time, I wanted to allude the romance that was beginning to happen and a certain event in the later episodes of the show.

This story was enjoyable to write especially since the block seemed to have lifted. :) I hope you enjoyed this story as well. I would love to hear from you.

Once again, I would like to thank Jen for beta reading this story as well as becoming a mentor of sorts to me. I would like to thank everyone at Mulder's Refuge. Everyone there has been so wonderful to me.

If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Erin Blair