Title: New Mexico Nights
Category: MSR, Angst
Archive: Sure just let me know where
Disclaimer: Not mine
Spoilers: The Truth
SummaryMulder had sent her from the car to the motel room while he collected their baggage.
Mulder had sent her from the car to the motel room while he collected their baggage. He had grabbed the top two bags from the trunk and hoisted them out, eager to get showered and into bed, too tired even to collect the carrier of trash and fast-food containers that sat waiting on the front seat. Scully had stood, watching him run through the rain with the two small canvas bags and she had stepped aside to allow him to enter the room. Mulder dropped the holdalls onto the end of the bed and stopped, his back to her in the darkened room as she pulled the door closed, shutting out the damp night air, but not the rushing sound of the pounding rain. Mulder turned to face his exhausted partner, water dripping from the end of his nose and onto the carpet. He watched her lean back into the door and slide herself down to the worn brown carpet, her bottom finally reaching the damp patch where the rain had blown inwards as she waited for him.
He stood for a moment, hearing the thunk of her head against the hollow fibre of the cheap motel door. He was uncertain of what to do. He didn't know what to say to her now that she had left her life behind for him, now that they had stopped the car. Mulder settled for dropping to the generic brown motel carpet. He sat, six feet or so from where she had come to rest, legs crossed, not knowing what to do. Scully didn't give him any hints as she remained stationary by the door, her breathing even and her eyes still closed. Mulder wondered whether she had actually fallen asleep. She was exhausted by the journey. They'd been driving for days and she had refused to close her eyes at all except for a few minutes two nights ago when highway hypnoses had set in and lulled her to sleep. She had been angry at herself for the indiscretion, sulking beside him for the next five hours.
"Scully?" He whispered, not wanting to wake her if she was asleep, not knowing what he was going to say if she wasn't.
"Hmm?" Scully responded without opening her eyes.
"There's so much I need to tell you, but I can't find the words." It came out as a statement, sounding insolent and childish. Mulder grimaced and her eyes opened in time to see his annoyance at his own inarticulacy. She gave him a comforting smile, seeing his discomfort, his uncertainty. He looked like a little boy, sat Indian-style on the carpet before her, weary and dirty and more than a little sad. She knew she must look the same.
"Its okay, Mulder. We have plenty of time for that." She made no move to rise from the floor, but she beckoned him to her. Mulder obliged, changing from little boy to puppy dog as he crawled across a carpet that had been worn threadbare by the feet of too many tired travellers. Her hands welcomed him to her, pulling the big man into her lap and combing through his damp hair. Her eyes were brimming with tears as she smoothed over his bristled jaw-line, unbelieving that they were truly together at last, after so long apart.
"You must want to shower, baby." The endearment came naturally, a remnant from the time before. Mulder pulled himself upright, leaning on one hand and stroking her cheek with the other. Scully nodded, hating the rumpled clothes she had been wearing for too many days, the grime of days on the road clinging to her. She had been aching to wash her hair and let out a sigh as she slipped the band from her ponytail. Mulder longed to run his fingers through her auburn tresses, but Scully stood before he could reacquaint himself with her beauty. She smiled down at him before making her way across the dark room and into the bathroom. Mulder remained on the floor, listening to her boots unzip and thud to the floor, followed by a grateful sigh. Her clothes followed, making a slight rustling noise before he heard the shower run, the sound of water hitting tiles mingling with the rush of rain on concrete outside. Steam eased its way through the open door, creeping across the rug towards him.
She finally leaves the bathroom, emerging wrapped in a thin white towel, her hair entwined in another. She glances at Mulder, who is ready and waiting with his shaving kit. He vanishes into the still-dark bathroom. Scully watches him go, still wondering whether he is a figment of her imagination.
By the time Mulder drags himself from the shower, her hair is dry and she is wrapped in a robe he has not seen before. He settles himself on the floor once again, close, but not too close. He reaches out and touches the edge of her robe, feeling the cotton and missing the satin that she used to wear for him.
Mulder is lost in thought for long minutes before she calls him back to her.
"What are you thinking?"
Mulder tries humour, knowing that it always worked in the past. He hears himself mutter something bitter about being a failure, some remnant from his time in prison, a product of a brainwashing attempt. She isn't laughing.
Mulder wakes in the darkness, the rain still hammering outside and tracing patterns of reflected street-light over the sleeping beauty who lies in his arms. Their position has not altered since he climbed onto the bed beside her, hours ago. Scully sniffles in her sleep and Mulder smiles, his heart expanding with love and admiration for her.
As the sun begins to rise, the light behind the thin curtains growing from grey to silver, Mulder finds himself thinking about the changes he has catalogued in her. She is softer, in more ways than one. Motherhood has dulled the edges on both her body and her spirit. Although they have not yet been intimate, he can tell that her shape has changed, her bust is fuller, her washboard stomach more rounded beneath her shirt. She is more beautiful to him like this, her hair longer and darker now that she colours it, covering the white hairs that began to show after his disappearance. She smiles more, soft, sad smiles. Mulder knows that William taught her to smile again, and she hasn't forgotten the art. He thanks his son for this. She shows her feelings more, something she could never do before. She has cried many times since discovering him in the military jail-cell, unafraid of showing her weaknesses to him now. She is still the strong, independent woman he left behind, but he has a feeling that she has come close to breaking in the months they were apart. His heart rises against his ribs as he wonders what would have happened to her if he hadn't escaped, if they had executed him. He curses himself for his own selfishness. She is dedicated to him. He loves her for it and hates himself for his own dedication to the truth.
She stirs in his arms, as though his self-depreciating thoughts vex her in her sleep. She murmurs and turns, his arms relinquishing her hold on her slightly to allow her to turn onto her back. Her eyelids crease tightly closed before she sits up abruptly, gasping his name as she does.
"Woah, baby, its okay." He sooths her, rubbing her back and drawing her into his arms. She is startled by his presence, confused by her surroundings as she glances around nervously. She quickly dissolves into tears, burying her face against his chest as she sobs. "Hey, what is it?" Mulder holds her tightly as she sobs into his t-shirt, feeling her tears through the fabric. Finally, she pulls away, clinging to him still.
"I thought it was a dream...I thought you were a dream...but you're here..." She hiccups and Mulder understands. He wonders how many nights she has dreamt he was with her, only to wake alone. He sooths her, drawing her down to the mattress once again. She curls into his arms, her tears finally stopping. She has slept little more than five hours and he tries to lull her back to sleep, but she fights him, wanting to stay awake.
"Shhh, baby, you need your sleep." Mulder speaks to her like a child, but she refuses, shaking her head and pressing kisses into his chest. He longs for more contact, but knows that they both need to sleep, unsure that she is ready for things to move on so soon. But she knows his thoughts, her smile turning coy.
"I need you." She tells him, stilling in his arms. His eyes widen and his jeans are suddenly tight. She sighs and closes her eyes. "I need to know you are real, that you're really here." With fluid movements, she unties her sash and her hands slide beneath his shirt as her own skin beckons his hands. When he doesn't respond, she pauses, her eyes asking him why he doesn't want her. Mulder sighs and shakes his head at her. He never could resist Dana Scully.
He rolls them over quickly, leaving her gasping as he covers her body with his. He kisses her softly, and feels her warmth beneath him. He holds his weight off of her by propping himself up on his elbows, framing her face with his hands. She kisses him back hungrily, devouring his mouth as her small hands slip between their bodies to feel his heart beat. He kisses her again and again, remembering every time he has kissed her before. Mulder remembers the very first night that they admitted their weaknesses and tumbled gratefully into bed. He remembers kissing her the night his son was conceived. He remembers kissing her goodbye when he returned to Oregon with Skinner. Tears fall as he recalls their first kisses when he was returned, how his body ached for her, but he was too broken even to make love to her before her pregnant body got too large for such things. They cry together as he whispers of his happiness as they settled down to life as a family, then how their hearts were broken as they were forced to part - more kisses goodbye. Scully laughs as she reminds him of his anger, how he had demanded to know why They couldn't have waited until her body was healed enough to `muster up a decent goodbye fuck'. Mulder grins, pressing her down into the aged mattress, showing her his desire.
Scully blushes as Mulder parts her gown. His eyes devour her as he tells her she is more beautiful than he dared to remember. She is shy, wondering how it is that he sees her. She has never been able to see herself as he does. She proposes they have his eyes tested, telling him that William ruined her body, but that she never really liked it anyway. Mulder laughs and blows a raspberry on her stomach, making her giggle. He tells her that her breasts are larger and she covers them with her hands, suddenly shy.
The last time Mulder saw her like this, she was heavily pregnant. He had helped her take a bath, her tiny body overwhelmed by pregnancy and unable to lift herself in and out of the tub. Before that, they had been intimate only a few times. Their love is nothing new to them, but the physical side to their relationship is still something that both frightens and excites them.
Mulder takes her hands in his, kissing her pale skin and sucking a nipple into his mouth. She sighs and frees her hands to clasp his head. She draws his face to hers and they kiss again. Scully feels his lips curve against hers and she mumbles that she cannot get enough of his mouth. He laughs, struggling to break away from her grasp so as to remove his clothes. He wants her so much. He has waited so long.
As Mulder stands to remove his jeans, his previously coy partner positions herself on the bed. Her gown is draped over her, concealing from view that which he most desires and she props herself up on one hand. Mulder hurries to remove his jeans, stumbling slightly and making her giggle. The sound makes him hurry all the more. He tells her how she was the only thing he thought of whilst he was gone, how thinking of her gave him the will to go on. Without her he would have surely died. She nods, feeling the same. He crawls up the bed towards her, seeing her toes curl in anticipation. Since the night he was taken, eighteen months ago, she has not made love to this man. Scully feels her breath hitch as his hand glides down the smooth white plain of her stomach and slides into her body with a familiarity that she did not think possible after so long.
Mulder knows every inch of her body by heart. He has made love to her a thousand times in his dreams and he knows she has done the same. She whispers to him that she needs him now, that she wants all of him and Mulder is undone. His heart races and his self control deserts him entirely. He has waited too long to be with her again.
He forces himself to be gentle, reminding himself that her body has been through a lot since they were last together. She gasps slightly at the heat of his touch, but her body yields to his. She clutches at his shoulders, burning at the sensation of being joined with him after spending eternity apart. Scully cannot help but cry as he moves inside her, filling her so perfectly. Her thoughts race as Mulder loves her body so passionately. She thinks of their son, she thinks of all they have been through together, and then she cannot think of anything as her body begins to shudder and her mind is filled with white noise. She comes hard and fast and feels herself bucking in counterpoint to his thrusts. She cries out his name over and over before she blacks out, the sensation too much for her exhausted body to take. Mulder climaxes with her, her clenching body wringing the orgasm from him until he cannot breath and he collapses beside her, careful not to lay too heavily on her.
Scully opens her eyes as the throbbing subsides, amazed that he could have the power to make her feel so intensely. Mulder's face is peaceful as he sleepily opens his eyes too. She smiles at him, her face against his chest, and he grins back, feeling her smile more than he sees it. She sighs, slipping into sleep as the sun falls across the end of the bed. Mulder's arms wrap tightly around her before he too drops off to sleep, his body sated and his mind at ease at last.
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