TITLE: Heart's Desire
CLASSIFICATION: MSR, SMUT
SPOILERS: Up to Season 6 (none really)
KEYWORDS: Mulder/Scully Romance
DISCLAIMER: If I owned them, they'd never make it out of bed to investigate.
SUMMARY: Mulder is not quite feeling like himself. Scully doesn't know what to think. Madame FeFe casts a spell and everyone lives happily ever after. Isn't that how these things are supposed to go?
FEEDBACK: Means so much to a writer. It's quick, easy, and cheap for you, but it's priceless to the person you're sending it to.
Beta Thanks: Cratkinson, what can a girl say but...you're amazing. You make the work you do look so easy! I don't know how you do it. You offer your time, comments, edits, making me look better than I am, and asking for nothing in return. Thank you for constantly teaching me, and not getting angry when I continue to make those pesky mistakes over again. It means a great deal to me. As I've said before, you have a gift. I'm so thankful you share that gift with me. If any of you would like to read some fantastic fics, you can find Cratz's stories here:
Opus, as always, thank you for making those hilarious comments throughout the duration of this piece. Your support of my solo projects is greatly appreciated. We'll get to that next Xfile... I promise!!
This fic was created from the BTT challenge and is dedicated to the author ML. This was my first challenge fic. Thank you to all the wonderful Truthseekers for taking Opus and I under your wing and making us feel at home. Big virtual hugs to you all!
The challenge element: Use the phrase "she knew it was wrong, but did it anyway..." in your fic. I think I used it three times...do I get extra points for that? <grin>
DAY 1 - Monday
She knows it is wrong, but she does it anyway. He wants proof? He'll have his proof. I just hope that he's ready for it. A sly grin adorns her face. Ask and you shall receive; the clich spins a web of certainty within her mind.
She holds up a small vial containing a shimmering pink powder. Two pinches of this and he'll have undeniable proof.
"Be careful what you wish for, dear Agent Mulder, you just might get it," she whispers to the empty room, following it with a small giggle.
Hopefully, the redhead with little faith will be accommodating, she thinks as she returns with the tea. Giving him a once-over, she confirms what she already knew. With a male specimen like that, no woman in her right mind would deny him his heart's desire.
Especially if that desire is her.
She knows it is wrong, but she does it anyway. She hands him the tea and as she touches his hand, she casts the spell.
He folds his long legs into the passenger side of the car. He balls up his blazer and throws it in the back. His face looks ashen. "Mulder, what's wrong with you?"
"Scully, uh, I...I don't know." I feel his forehead and he's a bit warm, but no fever. "My stomach has butterflies and I feel...warm all over. I think...I think that Madame FeFe in there slipped me a mickey. Probably in the tea." He clutches at his stomach.
"What? No, Mulder. I had some of the tea and I don't feel sick." I bring my fingertips up to his brow and check his pupils. They're dilated and his eyes are trained on my chest. He's not making eye contact with me. What the hell is he looking at? I venture a glance down and realize that one of the buttons on my blouse has come undone and is currently giving my all-tooattentive partner a nice cleavage shot. I blush
"No, Scully. She handed us that tea in separate cups. She didn't make it in front of us." His hand comes to rest on my upper thigh and he closes his eyes. He moves the hand on my thigh back and forth in a light caress as his breathing starts to settle into a steady rhythm. What is going on? His hand lightly creeps under the edge of my skirt, his fingertips wisping along my inner thigh. Immediately my body temperature rises and my own breathing becomes labored.
"Mulder, what are you doing?" I look at him quizzically and then down to the hand that's creeping its way under my skirt. He opens his eyes and licks his lips.
"Touching you is uh, it's...making me feel a little better," he stammers. "Although the need to touch you is becoming overwhelming. I don't understand." I lick my lips frantically as the concern for my partner grows. "God, Scully do you have any idea how beautiful you are?" Now I know something is wrong with him. His hand sporadically squeezes my inner thigh and I try to shift my legs so he can't move his hand any farther. He doesn't catch the hint. His other hand comes up to the side of my face, his thumb sweeps across my lips seductively. Holy hell. Why is this happening?
"Mulder, you're not yourself." I move away from his lingering hand on my cheek and mouth. "Stay here, I'm going to go in and have a word with Madame FeFe." He looks panicked. "You'll be fine, just take deep breaths. I'll be right back." He starts breathing deep again and I quickly get out of the car. I look over my shoulder and Mulder has his head back on the head rest and his hand squeezing his temples. If she did something to harm him, she will pay. I take the steps to her cottage two at a time and bang on the oversized door.
"Yes, darling," she says with a slight accent as she opens the door. "Did you forget something?"
"What the hell did you do to my partner? He's feeling sick and acting strange." The woman smiles and snickers, completely pissing me off.
"Do something to him? Not exactly. I gave him a pinch of reality, sweetie, that's all." She brushes at the black curls that have fallen into her face.
"And what is that supposed to mean? He says you slipped something into his tea. What was it?" I pull out my gun and just about snarl at the women.
"Calm down. It will wear off when he has received his heart's desire." She purses her lips and looks at me as if she's bored.
"His heart's desire. Why that?" I look over my shoulder and Mulder has his eyes trained on me. His look, even from this distance, is intense. It's as if he's staring a hole straight through me.
"Well, darling, when you were using the restroom, he questioned me about my spells and the craft. He wanted proof. So I gave it to him," she says in what I perceive to be an evil tone. I'll kill her. God, give me the strength to get through this without putting a hole into her head.
"So what you're saying is that you cast a spell and put something in his tea to prove your talent?" I say with disgust. She nods her head in agreement. "Okay, and this spell is broken when he receives his heart's desire. Which would be what, exactly?"
She shrugs. "That I cannot reveal. But I have a feeling you'll be finding out shortly." She smiles widely and winks. Christ, this woman is driving me up the wall.
"You have no idea what you may have done to him. His heart's desire is finding his sister, his sister who has been missing for twenty years." I just about scream into her face. "For all we know, she just may be dead." The woman shakes her head no several times. "No, no what?"
"No, his heart's desire is not that, I've seen what it is. I do not practice black magick. I would never cast a spell that would react poorly on such a good-hearted man." I roll my eyes back behind my lids. I'm becoming unbelievably irritated. I move my hands in a "hurry-up" motion and venture a look towards the car. He's out of the car and leaning against the hood waiting for me to return. Madame Fefe looks over my shoulder and smiles. "His heart's desire is something that will complete his soul," she says matter-of-factly and crosses her arms over her chest. "Frankly, I believe I've done him a favor."
"Now what do I do for him? How can we reverse the spell?" She cringes at my tone. It's obvious that she couldn't care less.
"You cannot reverse the spell. For the next week he will need to advance on his heart's desire or he will get sicker. However, if he doesn't deal with this problem, he will most certainly be doomed to a life of unhappiness." I pale. Oh God, no. I bring my gun to her head. "It will wear off in a week, I promise!" She recoils against her front door. "He asked for it!"
"If he dies, I will kill you." My arm starts shaking and from out of nowhere, Mulder's arms surround me and his hands are pulling me back.
"Scully, what are you doing?" He pulls the gun from my death grip and swings me around to face him.
"Mulder, she cast a spell on you. You are going to continue to feel sick unless you achieve your heart's desire. She claims you wanted proof of her trade."
"She's right, I did. I asked her for proof. She said eventually I'd receive it." The woman smiles and nods her head in agreement. I'll kill her. I'm going to rip every one of those curls right off her head. Mulder holds me tight against his chest so I'm unable to lash out at her physically.
"He will not die, Agent Scully. His desire will overtake him until he receives it. It will come and go, sometimes it will be easier to control, other times it will be something that is allencompassing. Depends on what the desire is."
She winks at Mulder and then looks back at me and then to him. "You'll be fine, love, just don't deny yourself." With that, she enters her shop. "Call me in a couple days if you are still experiencing difficulty. I'll see what I have for severe cases where one is unable to achieve their desire and gets too sick. Regardless, it will pass in a week." She shuts the door and Mulder continues to hold me.
"Scully, I'm fine. I'm feeling better already. It's probably nothing. Besides, when did you all of a sudden become a believer?" He holds me closer to him.
"Fine, Mulder, but you're not leaving my sight for the next week." I move out of his grip. He cringes and raises his hand to his stomach. I could open the door and shoot her right now. I could. Just for harming a federal agent.
He clutches my hand and takes a deep breath in. We walk back to the car hand-in-hand. Strange. I break away from him and he just about runs to his side of the car and hops in quickly. God, I'm so worried about him. I don't know what to expect. His heart's desire? I doubt he even knows what that entails. I get in the car and he grabs my hand, intertwining his fingers with mine. Now what? He's probably just reassuring me that he's fine.
I look at him holding my hand; his thumb is moving slowly across the top. I pull the car away from the curb and head towards Georgetown. We should be there in an hour. His hand unclasps from mine and I exhale. Good. All this touching is unnerving me even more. His hand moves to my thigh once again. Looks like I spoke too soon. Damn. Doesn't he realize what this is doing to me?
I venture a look in his direction and again he's staring at me. "What, Mulder? Do I need to take you to a hospital?" He shakes his head no. His hand is continuing to make maddening treks down my thigh.
"Is this okay, Scully?" I look at him and he looks down at my thigh and his large hand covering its surface. I take in a deep breath to control my emotions and look back at him. I can't speak. He's looking at me as if he's the hungriest man in the world and I'm his next meal. He really must be feeling horrible. I frown at him and he squeezes my thigh once again. "Scully..."
"Mulder, why?" I whisper.
"It's making me feel better. Being near you always makes me feel better." His head falls back onto the headrest and he grins in my direction. He looks like a little kid who just found out he's getting what he asked for under the Christmas tree. He's acting so strange.
"Mulder, I'm going to have the guys check out Madame FeFe. You may think she's legit, but we have no idea what she did to you. I want to know everything about her." I grip my hands into fists around the steering wheel, feeling a bit more calm and rational.
"As long as I'm with you, I'll go along with anything." His hand creeps a little farther up my thigh and I put my foot on the gas. I need to get him home. He needs to rest. Maybe he'll sleep this off and it will be gone in the morning.
What the hell is happening to me? My body feels flushed from head to toe. My heart is beating rapidly, and the need to copulate with my partner is becoming excruciating to my lower extremities. I need a cold shower. That's the cure-all. A very cold shower.
"Scully, mind if I take a shower?" She stops sifting through her mail and looks up at me. She says something in return but I can't hear her. Damn. My partner is sexy as hell. Her blazer is hanging over her kitchen chair; her legs are crossed in such a manner that I can see more of her thigh than usual, and she never did button that one that slipped loose earlier. I start breathing deeply and my vision becomes centered on her. Everything around her fades to black. Creamy skin; deep blue eyes; luscious, moist, red lips made just for kissing.
Without thinking, I move over to her with all the stealth of a barracuda. She cowers back as I tower over her. Again, she's speaking. I hear nothing but the pounding in my chest, the desire swirling through my veins. Her eyes widen in shock as I grab her wrist and yank her to a standing position, bringing her hard against my chest. She balances herself by gripping my biceps tightly. She shakes the hair that has fallen into her face and I pounce.
Lips crushing lips, arms around her back holding her tightly. My hands move up behind her head, gripping her face to mine. She gasps and my tongue enters her mouth roughly, taking what's mine.
Mine. Mine. Mine.
Too much, too much, too much.
Air, air, air.
She pulls away from my mouth forcefully and sucks in a huge breath. Gasping and panting she looks at me as if she's been electrocuted, shocked.
"Mul..." she gasps but doesn't finish.
"Scully, oh God. I'm sorry. Really, I don't...I don't know what...what came over me." Panic is taking over. What did I just do to her, to us? She wipes her fingers over her mouth and straightens her hair, not meeting my eyes. "I'm sorry. Scully?" She shakes her head yes and moves out of my grasp.
"It's, uh...it's okay, Mulder." She grips the back of the chair, steadying herself. "I said, the towels are in the linen closet next to the bathroom."
She doesn't want to talk about this. She's just going to pretend that it never happened. Emotional abandonment. Great. I nod and make my way to the bathroom, pulling a towel from the closet as I pass. It's all downhill from here.
Mulder just kissed me. He REALLY kissed me. Oh, and it was so good. I haven't been kissed like that...well, I have never been kissed quite like that. He was so animalistic, so
passionate, so...charmed. No. No, Dana, don't even think that. That kiss had absolutely nothing to do with what took place today, other than the fact that he's been feeling sick and maybe has a fever. Right. That's it! A fever overtook him, and he wasn't reacting in his right mind.
Whew, but that was some kiss. I felt it through my entire body. I lift up my hand to sweep my hair off my neck, trying to cool my overheated skin. God, it was fantastic. His body was warm against mine and he was kissing me with the tenaciousness of a man finally receiving what he wants. What he wants? No. Not me. I'm not what he wants. It was the fever, I remind myself. Wasn't it?
I need to get out of these clothes and damp panties. They're reminders of how much I really enjoyed his overture. But why did he react like that? He had just asked me if he could take a shower, and then wammo! He was mauling me. Well, he wasn't mauling me per se, just overly friendly. Oh come on, Dana, be honest with yourself. The man you've wanted for years up and kissed you. Deal with it. But how? We've never discussed this before. Maybe I can just pretend like it didn't happen. Yes, that's what always works best for us. Just go about our evening.
Food. We need to eat. I'll order Chinese and have it delivered. Then, straight to bed for us. I mean him on the couch and me in my bedroom. Jeez! Freud would have a field day with my frame of mind right now. As would Mulder. I take a deep breath and enter my sanctuary--my room. I feel much better already. I've got a perfect plan that once set into action will alleviate the tension. It's only a week. Just until I'm certain that the wicked witch of the west's "spell" has worn off. Spell, my ass.
DAY 2 - Tuesday
Work was an experience in endurance. I don't know how I was ever able to sit in a room with her for an entire day and not want to boink her brains out. Adolescent? Oh yeah. Everything that occurred today I imagined her doing naked. Is it even possible to imagine someone naked in 15 different scenarios over the course of one solitary day? No? Well, I have mastered it. It will be placed right up there with how many pencils I can shoot into the ceiling tiles of our basement office. And now it seems as though I have taken to not only asking myself questions in my mind, but answering them. Great.
You know, it wouldn't have been my fault if she hadn't bumped into me this morning only wearing a towel. She had forgotten I was there, left something in the other bathroom the night before, and I had to suffer the consequences of that error. Lucky me. Then again, how often do I get to see Scully dripping wet in only a towel. She was a vision of beauty. I was barely able to contain myself. It was pathetic really. She bumped into me and I banged myself into the wall behind me like a frightened child. Although little Mulder was lurching forward, towards the sweet nectar of the gods in the hopes of a taste, at least I was able to restrain the urge. Oh, but it was so hard. Hard, in every sense of the word known to mankind.
"Mulder, I asked if you wanted chicken or spaghetti for dinner?" She saunters into the living room. She looks at me with her head cocked to the side. "Are you feeling ill again?" Aw, Doctor Scully is making an appearance. She's so considerate. Always concerned about my well-being. I want to say, "Why? Are you offering to fix my ailment, Doctor Scully?" and waggle my eyebrows suggestively, but I won't. The innuendo brings a whole new meaning to the suggestion for me right now.
"Uh, I'm okay, Scully. Stomach is still unsettled but nothing a little spaghetti wouldn't fix," I hint. She smiles, nods her head in affirmation and ventures back into the kitchen. The unsettling in my stomach rumbles and twitches. Maybe I'm just getting sick? Stranger things have happened. I'll guess I should see if Scully needs a little help.
I walk through the living room and lean against the archway, watching her break the noodles and toss them into the pot. Her hair is glistening under the fluorescent light above. It shines brighter red than the burner boiling the noodles. Her hand comes up to her face and pushes a stray lock of hair behind her ear. Her pale-skinned neck is in stark contrast against the navy of her sweater. Her beauty is ethereal. How is it that she doesn't know the power she holds over the opposite sex?
My hands start to shake as I watch her. I shove them into my pockets without her noticing I'm in the room. The need to just touch her lately is overwhelming. It's a mystery actually. Years of pent up sexual tension for this delectable woman and now, I'm having a hard time
containing it? Why? Maybe I've just had enough of pretending I don't care for her in a manner other than friendship.
She grabs the pot to pour the noodles into the strainer. "Need any help?" She jumps and the pot falls about 10 inches to the counter splattering her hand with boiling water.
"Oooooouuuuuuuuchhhhhhh" she screams while jumping back. I'm behind her in an instant, pulling her to me. She shakes her hand frantically and I grip her wrist and bring her hand up to look at the burn. Her thumb sustained most of the damage and she tries to pull it from my grasp. "Damn, it burns!"
Without thinking I place her thumb into my mouth, swirling my tongue around the tender skin. She gasps and I continue to bathe the digit softly. She tilts back and I sweep my other arm around her waist, holding her to me while I comfort her. After her breathing settles a bit I remove the digit from my mouth and place light tender licks and kisses all over her hand. "Mul...deerrrrr". I don't meet her eyes. Instead, I turn her hand over and place one last lingering kiss into her palm.
"See, all better." She opens her mouth but doesn't respond. I'm still holding her body to me and this realization shocks me as if I was the one burned. I pull back and she sways, leaning against the counter. The heat in the air is stifling. She shakes her head as if she's trying to avoid a pesky gnat, possibly clearing her thoughts. "What can I help with?" I reiterate.
"Well, you could help me clean up this mess. I'm such a klutz today. I don't know what's gotten into me." Her face reddens. "A steady hand is a pathologist's most important tool." She bites her lip and turns toward the sink.
"In your defense, I startled you. I wouldn't be turning in the scalpel just yet." We both laugh and I'm proud that I was able to diffuse the tension with a little humor. I just hope it lasts.
I can't believe he did that. The minute he put my thumb into his mouth I was completely entranced by him. Everything moved in slow motion. The swirling of his tongue around my burned thumb, the tenderness with which he later kissed my hand, and--the mother of them all--his sensuously kissing my palm. Now that, I didn't imagine, and can't interpret as his not feeling well. But why now?
I look over at him and he's trying hard not to make eye contact with me. It's as if he's embarrassed by his actions in the kitchen. I'm not embarrassed per se, although I am surprised at my body's reaction to what occurred. That must be the problem. In the past two days he's made more advances on me physically than in all the years we've worked together. Even in the office today it was as though he made a concerted effort to touch me any way he could without being too obvious.
How am I supposed to get through an entire week of this? I twirl the spaghetti around my fork, watching its form snake around the utensil. Much like how Mulder's been skating around me. He's already invaded my personal space more times than necessary, but what's the reason?
I peek up and he's finally looking at me, staring actually. God, this is getting unnerving. I put the spaghetti into my mouth and slurp the noodles that fell from their spiral. His mouth opens and his eyes dilate. Oh no, it's happening again. I think he's seeing me, but not. Is that possible?
"Mulder." He doesn't hear me. I grab his hand across the table and he clutches it
protectively. "Mulder ... are you okay?" He licks his lips. "Mulder," I say louder. That finally seems to get through to him. He shakes his head and the color in his eyes return. "Mulder, you're scaring me. I think we need to get you checked out."
"No," he says and pulls his hand away from mine. "I'm fine. Really." He makes a small smile that doesn't reach his eyes.
"Mulder, I'm worried about you. I don't think you're being honest with me."
"Scully, I'm always honest with you," he says quickly in defense.
"Fine." I get up from the table, bringing my half-eaten dinner into the kitchen. If he doesn't want to tell me, fine. I can respect that. He doesn't have to. There's more times than not that I've kept my own emotions locked away.
I hear his steps behind me, approaching tentatively. I pretend I don't hear him and rinse my dinner plate. He sets his on the counter to my left and brings his hands up to my shoulders. I sigh loud enough for him to hear my irritation. His fingers skim my neck, causing me to shiver. His chest comes in contact with my back and his fingers start to massage my shoulders. Awww...so good. I lean back into him as his chin comes to rest on the top of my head.
"Scully, I'm okay. Yes, I'm still feeling slightly under the weather, but I think it's just a cold. Nothing to worry about." He stops massaging and brings his face next to mine, leaning his head where his lips meet my ear. "I appreciate your concern." The proximity of his lips on my ear is rattling to my senses. It's as if I'm hypersensitive to his touch. His hands move to my waist and he places a soft kiss against the side of my jaw. Oh Jesus, did it just get warm in here? "I'm going to take a shower." He says against my ear and then he pulls away. I feel cold immediately with the loss of his warm body against mine.
I take a few moments in stunned silence trying to figure out what's happening between us. First the car, then the kiss, the touches, the burn experience, and now this? I'm so confused.
Day 3 - Wednesday
Oh my god, the pain is excruciating. What the fuck is happening to me? I can hardly feel my legs due to the pain in my stomach and the whopping migraine pounding in my temples is one step away from blinding. I take deep breaths and tilt back in my office chair trying to find some semblance of relief. Nothing's working. Hell, maybe I do need medical attention.
Where is she? I need her here. Something is definitely wrong with me. This is not the flu or a bad cold. She should be back by now. She said the consultation over at Quantico would be quick. It's been over two hours. The minute she left our office the pain started and has now reached unfathomable levels. I look over at the clock for the umpteenth time. Where is she?!
Okay, I'm going to call her. I can't handle this. My arm reaches out and shakily presses the speaker button on the phone and the button for speed dial one. It rings and rings. Her voicemail picks up and I disconnect before the beep. Where is she? She said it would be a quick consultation, no more than an hour. Oh God, what if something happened to her? What if one of our enemies is watching me and taking this moment of weakness to take revenge on us? No, please no.
The door swings open and she comes bustling into the office. "Hi Mul...oh God, what's wrong?" She drops the files and her jacket where she stands and rushes over to me. Her hands immediately come to my face to check my temperature. I'm sure she'll find it boiling. Aw, that's nice. Her hands are cool and welcoming. I lean into her palms cupping my cheeks. The jack-hammering in my temples starts to subside and I sigh happily.
"I'm so happy you're here." I clasp her hands to my face comfortingly. "You're so much cooler than I am."
"I'll say. Mulder, you're sick. You need to get to a doctor"
"That's why I have you." I look up at her face. Those worry lines have appeared on her brow and her face is contorted into a grimace.
"No, Mulder, you have me to knock some sense into you. Can you stand?" She leans forward and grabs my waist helping me to an upright position.
"Now I can. Before you got here I felt almost paralyzed. Now that you're here it's as if a weight has been lifted. I'm already feeling better." Amazing, but true.
"Oh, no. No you don't, Mulder. I'm taking you to the doctor and I don't want to hear one word." I open my mouth to protest, "No. You need medical attention and I'm going to make sure you receive it. I don't care if I have to drag you kicking and screaming. This is nonnegotiable." Damn, she's hot when she's
"What do you mean, there's nothing physically wrong with him?" I practically yell at Dr. Jacobsen. This is unbelievable. Maybe I need to get a second opinion.
"I'm sorry, Dr. Scully, but I've run all the tests, checked all of his levels and there's nothing medically wrong with him. It sounds as if he had an anxiety attack. Those are the symptoms he showed, right?"
"Well, technically, yes. But I've seen this happen to him right in front of me. He's experienced fever, blackening of vision, dizziness and strange behavioral bouts that I wouldn't attribute to an anxiety attack." The doctor is looking at me apologetically.
"I understand that it is unusual for your friend to have this particular problem, but it is not unheard of. It can be attributed to stress from overexerting oneself..."
"I know all of the possible causes, Dr. Jacobsen. I took that in class in medical school," I remind him. "This just doesn't fit what I've experienced with him. Why would he go from severe pain in his stomach and temples to a dull ache for no apparent reason?" Am I speaking to a brick wall? Is he not paying attention?
He looks to Mulder and then to me. "May I speak with you privately for a moment?" The doctor gestures for me to move outside of the room and away from Mulder.
"Mulder, I'll just be a minute." He waves his hand and rests his head against the pillow.
"Dr. Scully, I know that you are being told what he is feeling, but do you think it's possible that he may be faking the extremity of his problem for attention?" What?! I roll my eyes. "Maybe he's trying to get the attention of a pretty young doctor. I've seen it a million times."
"Dr. Jacobsen, he is not an acquaintance of mine or a stranger. This man is my partner and friend. He wouldn't lie to me about something like this. He's not making it up." I shake my head angrily. "No, I believe this is happening to him, and I will find out, with or without your medical assistance." I open the door to Mulder's room and slam the door behind me.
"Mulder, we're out of here. Get your things. We're going home." He leaps off the bed all too easily and I watch warily. No, he's just feeling better. He didn't lie.
We leave the hospital and get into the car. "Scully, I think I know what's happening to me."
"Well, I don't believe you were having anxiety attacks, that's for sure. I'm going to do some research at home, make some calls..." He puts his hand on my thigh which stops me midsentence.
"Scully, I think we're forgetting the obvious."
I look at him, eyebrow raised. "Go on?"
"Well, just consider the possibility that this has something to do with Madame FeFe and her spell." I smile uncontrollably. "No, Scully, listen. She said I was going to get sick and due to my recent behavior and actions, I'd say that's exactly what's happening."
"Look, as angry as I was the other day, after reviewing the situation, it's highly
implausible that a spell has anything to do with what you've been experiencing." We head into our familiar bantering.
"We've seen stranger things. Originally, I doubted her talent. I've experienced others who have had the gift and honestly, I didn't believe her myself, but after the past couple days, it seems as though I've gotten my proof."
"Mulder, we've experienced nothing of the kind. This is a medical condition and just because Dr. Jacobsen was unable to find the cause doesn't mean I won't." He sighs loudly and it seems to echo in the confined space. "Okay, fine, let's think about this rationally. If Madame FeFe's prediction or spell, whatever you'd like to call it is correct, then the way to cure it is to achieve your heart's desire." He nods his head in agreement. "So, what's your heart's desire?"
"I'd imagine that of everything, I want to find Samantha. That's what we've been searching for, that's been my quest for longer than I can remember." He seems to consider his answer quietly to himself.
"Exactly, Mulder. But when I asked that very question, she said that was not your heart's desire, that she knows what it is, and...it was something that would complete your soul."
"Complete my soul?".
"Yes, something that's your heart's desire and that would complete your soul. Samantha would be it. That being said, it completely disproves the notion that you are suffering the effects of a spell." Ha ha, I win! He can't rebut. He's gone quiet and stares out the window.
"There's more to it that we're missing," he shakes his head, looking dismayed. "I need to talk to Madame FeFe."
"Why bother? There's nothing she can tell you that will cure your sudden onset of illness."
"Then it couldn't hurt. I'll call her
tomorrow." He's apparently not going to let this go.
"You do that." We're silent the rest of drive to my apartment.
I have to be near her. The pain is back and the only way I feel better is to be near her. Maybe Dr. Jacobsen was right. I could very well be having panic attacks. Why? I don't know. There's no reason for them. It doesn't matter, my heart is beating rapidly against my chest and I feel cold, so cold. My teeth start chattering as I enter her room.
The minute the door opens, she wakes. "Mulder?"
"Scully, I'm cold, I just...I just need to be near you." She pulls back the covers in invitation for me to sit.
"Come here, let me feel your head." I sit and she once again puts her soft, small hands on my forehead. They act like a healing balm. "Mulder, you're warm, not cold."
"I don't know why, but being near you makes it better. Scully, I don't understand and I can't explain it," I whimper.
"Try," she whispers in the dark room. I can barely see her silhouette from the small amount of moonlight shining through her blinds.
"It's...it's strange. I was on the couch, my stomach stared churning almost like butterflies fluttering, a headache started to form and I got really cold. I swear it's what you feel when you've got the flu. Then..." I struggle to continue.
"Then..." I encourage him to continue.
"Then I get near you and the symptoms subside. Sitting here with you, the headache dissipates quickly. When I touch you, my stomach stops churning." He puts his hands on my waist. His rigid body relaxes into a slumped sitting position. "When I hold you," he continues, "I'm warm again." He brings me into a tender hug. His hands sweep up and down my back, the lightest of touches but I can feel it
everywhere. Funny, I get warm when he holds me, too.
"Mulder, I...I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything. Under normal circumstances I would never ask, but can I sleep here?" I think about it for long moments. He's still holding me against his chest. It's the most comfortable place, I know I'd sleep soundly with him lying next to me, but it is wrong on so many different levels. Without my answer he moves to pull away. "I'm sorry, Scully. I shouldn't have asked. I don't know what I was thinking."
I grab his wrist, stopping him from getting up from the bed. "You can sleep here. Of course you can." What am I doing? "We're friends, best friends." Who am I trying to convince, him or me? "Come on, lie back." I fluff the pillow I was just using and he lays his head down. I turn and lie back on the other side of the bed, the side normally unused, and make myself comfortable. His hand is holding mine under the comforter and his body relaxes completely, but he doesn't loosen his grasp. I can tell he's already falling asleep by his breathing pattern. I close my eyes and hope I made the right decision.
Day 4 - Thursday
"Mmmmm, Scully, yeah, right...oh yeah, right there."
Hot, I'm very hot. I wake slowly to a body completely encircling mine and my name being murmured into my ear. Where am I? I wake more fully and remember the evening before. It's Mulder. I relax back into a light comfortable doze.
"You like that? Mmmmmm, I could do this to you all day." Whoa! His hand comes up and clasps my right breast. Oh God. I can't move easily because half his body is covering mine. His face is lying near mine and his lips are grazing my ear. Hell, I need to remove myself from this. It's obvious he's having a dream, a very good one.
"Scully...mmm, soooooo good." He's dreaming about me! Oh God. His hand squeezes my breast and slides down my ribcage. Okay, good, now I can think straight. I have to get out of this. He doesn't know what he's doing.
As I move, his hand creeps underneath my night shirt and his warm palm closes around my breast once again. I moan automatically. "Mmmmm," he says in return. His fingers swirl around my nipple and I try to tell myself not to respond to his touch. I need to remove myself from him, to wake him up, but I can't find the energy to move or speak. It's just too much. His lips start nipping at my ear and breathing heavily against one of my most sensitive erogenous zones. He moves his leg and grinds a very impressive erection against my hip. Oh hell, I need to get out of this somehow, but...oh, but it feels so good. When was the last time I had a man in my bed, a man touching and rubbing his desire for me against my body? And, to take the cake, mmmmmm...it's Mulder!
His fingers pinch my nipple as his lips skim down the column of my neck. "Mulllldddeerrr," I moan out loud, urging him on. His body goes still and in reaction I follow suit. Oh shit, he woke up. Should I pretend to be asleep? I close my eyes and try to control my breathing but it doesn't work. I'm so aroused I'm basically panting. His hand makes a slow decent, withdrawing from my shirt, and he turns his body away from me, lying on his back. Crap.
I turn over to face him and watch as he torments himself. His hands are clenched into fists covering his eyes. "'I'm sorry' isn't going to be enough," he says through clenched teeth.
"Mulder, you were dreaming, I was dreaming. We're not used to sleeping next to another person. Your response was perfectly natural." I try to say it clinically, but fail miserably.
"It's not perfectly natural, Scully, not for us. I fucked up. I'm sorry."
"Mulder, you didn't realize what you were doing." He looks at me with a pained expression and sits up, then moves to get out of the bed. He grabs his jeans and slips them on.
"Yes, I did," he whispers. Before walking out of the room, he stops at the door and with head hung low, he says, "I wanted it. I wanted you." He goes through the hallway and picks up his jacket, gun and keys and leaves without looking back. I'm stunned stupid--sitting in bed, mouth opened wide and chest heaving. I think I'm having an anxiety attack.
Everything's ruined. It's over. She'll go in to work, ask for a transfer and never speak to me again. How could I have almost taken advantage of her like that? The questions swirl through my mind as a whirlwind of painful images of her leaving, packing her stuff and not returning my calls knocks the breath from my chest. My cell phone rings but I don't answer it. There's only one person I want to talk to right now and she's not going to be happy about it.
I pull into the driveway of Madame FeFe's cottage. She will fix this, I can't handle it any longer. I take the steps to her door two at a time and bang on the door. I bang a few more times before the door swings open to reveal a startled Madame FeFe.
"What did you do to me?!" I say one notch below yelling.
"I only did as you wished, Mr. Mulder," she says sweetly and opens the door in invitation.
"I did not wish for whatever it is you did to me." I'm barely able to contain my rage. The sickness over what I did to Scully this morning is weighing heavily on my nerves.
She walks into a small but overly decorated sitting area. "You wanted proof of my craft, I gave it to you. You should be more careful in what you wish for, Mr. Mulder."
"Whatever. Look, I want it to stop. I've been sick ever since we left you on Monday. Now I want you to reverse it."
She smacks her tongue in a tsk tsk sound.
"I can't reverse it. You must obtain your heart's desire or it will continue until the week's out." This woman is maddening.
"I can't! I don't know what that is. I'm sick all of the time, I can hardly work, I'm making advances on my partner, which is completely out of character for me, and I want it to stop."
"Why do you think that is?"
"Why what is?"
"Why you are making advances toward your partner." She smiles secretively as if she knows the answer to her own question.
"I don't know," I say, frustrated. "That's why I'm here!"
"Does your sickness ever lessen or has it only increased in intensity over the past few days?" Why the fuck is she changing the subject?
"It comes and goes but somehow I think you already knew that. Now I want you to be straight with me. I feel like you're playing some type of game and I'm the unwilling participant." She grins.
"When exactly does it come and go?" More questions. Jesus woman, just do something to help.
"When I'm near her. It decreases considerably when I'm in her presence and subsides
completely when...when I make an advance toward her."
"'Her' being your partner? The beautiful redhead? The non-believer?" I grip my aching temples tightly.
"Yes," I grate out through clenched teeth.
"Well, there you have your answer." I could strangle her. Not often have I wanted to hurt a person but she's asking for it. Maybe I should arrest her...but hell, on what charges? She put a spell on Spooky Mulder. Yeah, that will go over well with the boys in blue.
"I don't understand."
"She's it." She smiles widely.
"She's what? What? I've about had it with this game. Just tell me what it is you're hinting at" I'm so tired of this.
"Your heart's desire, darling." I laugh out loud at the ludicrousness of what she's saying.
"Scully, my heart's desire?" I confirm. She nods her head yes. I shake my head no in response. "Scully's my friend, my best friend, and she's my partner. She's my work partner." I try to emphasize the word work.
"She complements you in friendship and in your work life?"
"Well, yeah, she's amazing. She's stayed with me when she should have left. She's saved my life, taken care of me when I've been hurt, has made my quest her own. She's the most caring, loving and considerate person I've ever known. I trust her with my life as she does me with hers." I shift uncomfortably in the chair under her watchful eye.
"Were you attracted to her before I cast the spell?" More questions. Great.
"Yes. Like you said, she's a beautiful woman." She's more than beautiful. She's unlike any other.
"I think it's time you evaluate your true feelings for your partner." Does she ever quit?
"Look, Scully is my partner and friend, that's all," I say, exasperated with her questions.
"And you can honestly sit there and tell yourself you believe that? I find that very sad, Mr. Mulder."
"I don't have to believe it. It is what it is. Look, are you going to help me or what?" I stand up, frustrated and tired. I need to go home, take a long hot shower and figure out how I'm going to deal with the fact that I'm losing her. My stomach burns and I keel over, grabbing my stomach protectively.
"You see, Mr. Mulder. You're not being truthful to her or to yourself. You need to tell her you're in love with her or the pain will continue."
I grit my teeth tightly, trying to breathe evenly. "I can't...I can't tell her." I suck in a huge breath and fall back into the chair. "Can't you do something?!" She just sits calmly with her hands crossed over her lap.
"Admit you love her and the pain will stop for awhile."
I shake my head and sweat beads form on my brow. My whole body is hot and sweaty and I feel like I'm being killed from the inside out.
"Say it!" she screeches.
"I love her! I love her!!" The pain is subsiding. I wipe the tears away from my eyes. "I love her, I love...Scully, oh God, so much," I whisper frantically. The pain lurches, heaves and comes to a halt. Thank you thank you thank you.
"Tell her, Mr. Mulder. No one should live like this. Think about it." She pats the top of my head and walks into the kitchen. "I'll get you some tea. Herbal tea," she promises. "It will make you feel even better."
Little does Madame FeFe know, I've already lost her. She's probably already removing her things from our office. Telling her won't matter.
Day 5 - Friday
He'd better be here. I've given him enough time alone. I can't stand it anymore. After he left yesterday morning he never made it in to work and called in sick today as well. He can't hide from me forever. I knock on his door, listening for signs of life. He doesn't answer. I know he's here. His car is parked out front and he's not at the Gunmen's.
I knock three more times, again getting no answer. He wants to play it this way, fine. I pull out my key and slip it into the lock easily. I open the door and am greeted by darkness. I close the door and walk into his living room without turning on the light. He's not lying on the couch where I expected him. I venture around the corner and hear the shower running. Perfect. He can't run away from me now. Modesty be damned.
The door is opened a crack and I peer in. I open the door farther. The room is humid and filled with warm steam. He's standing under the spray with his hand against the tiles in front of him. His head is hanging down as the water pours over his body. He looks dejected. Through the crystalline shower doors I can see his form, blurry but manly. Even through the glass I can see the sleek toned lines of his body. I try to control my emotions so that I can talk to him. He's not moving, he hasn't even realized the temperature change in the air. He's just standing there letting the scalding water pour over him.
"Mulder," I say and his head swings up. I can tell he's trying to see me through the doors.
"Scully, what are you doing here?" he says and hangs his head once again.
"I'm worried about you, Mulder. You didn't come in to work, you wouldn't return my calls. Why are you avoiding me?" I lean against the wall and cross my arms over my chest. Damn, the temperature in here is sweltering.
"Just leave," he murmurs through the fog.
"I'm not leaving until you talk to me."
He turns off the water and shakes his head, flinging the excess water from his hair. He opens the door and I'm taken aback at what I see. Tanned skin, muscled chest and legs, water droplets sliding down his form seductively. Makes me want to lick them before they fall to the tub and down the drain. I really should avert my eyes but I can't. His penis is hanging down, long and full. Oh, how I would love to...
"Scully, the towel." He's trying to pull it out from behind me. I didn't realize I was leaning against it.
"Uh...oh, sorry." I turn around and he moves around me, swinging the towel around him. He leaves the bathroom, heading for his bedroom. The towel is hung low on his waist and knotted at his hip. He didn't bother to dry off, probably because I was invading his personal space. Funny, but he didn't he care that I had entered his apartment unannounced or that I walked right in his bathroom while he was showering. He didn't even bat an eye at his state of undress in front of me.
"Look Scully, I'm fine. I'm getting better and I'll be in complete health after the weekend's over. Now what else did you want?" he says bitterly and slumps onto his bed, bringing his hand up to cup his head. His position and the lack of clothing make him look like The Thinker sculpture by Rodin. He's magnificent.
"I wanted to talk about what took place the other day, and what you admitted." Breathe, Dana, you can do this. You've been torturing yourself for two days. Trying to figure out what the words he confided in you mean has done nothing but drive you crazy. You've been teetering on this emotional cliff for far too long. It's time to dive off or sulk back away from it.
Oh, but what if he didn't mean it? God, maybe I shouldn't have come. I don't know if I'm able to deal with this. Everything that's happened over the past week has been like an earthquake to the world as we know it.
"Look, Scully, I've already apologized. I'll accept your reassignment to another division. I'll sign the paperwork Skinner gives me on Monday without a fight, okay? So you can save the goodbyes." He grips his temples with his fingers and rocks back and forth a bit. I can't see him like this.
I move over and sit next to him and set my hands on his bare shoulders. He recoils from my touch, which hurts my feelings tremendously, but I know what he's doing. "Is that what you think, Mulder? That I've asked for a transfer in your absence? That I can't handle what transpired between us?" I say as if it's the most ridiculous thing I've heard.
"If you haven't, I'll suggest it to Skinner myself." He actually believes what he's saying.
"You will do no such thing. Look, Mulder, not everything is about..."
"I took advantage of you!!" he screams and jumps off the bed. His towel is two more moves away from falling off. He clinches it with his hand and starts pacing the room.
"Mulder, no..." I shake my head.
"Yes, Scully. You opened your home to me, and you took care of me when I needed it and what did I do to you in return? I almost raped you!" he yells and slumps against the wall.
"You can't rape the willing, Mulder!" I throw back, not thinking about what I'm saying.
He looks up sharply. "What did you say?" His eyes are daggers, though they are softening in my silence.
"I said you didn't try to rape me." He comes over to me and clenches my shoulders roughly, pulling me into a standing position.
"That is not what you said." I lift up my chin in defiance of his manhandling but his presence--naked and freshly showered--is softening my resolve. Fine. He wants the truth, I'll give it to him.
"I said, you can't rape the willing, Mulder." I close my lips tightly and wait for his retort. It doesn't come. He just stares at me; his chest is heaving dramatically and his eyes are shifting from my eyes to my lips.
"You don't know what you're saying." He struggles to speak.
"Is that right? You don't know everything about me, Mulder." I'm tired of pretending. This ends here.
"Do you want me?" I question before I make one of the boldest moves of my life.
"Yes." He didn't even think about it before responding.
"Well, than I have no choice." With that I grab his face and haul him into a harsh kiss. I don't let up. I demand entrance into his mouth with my teeth, biting his lips none to gently. He opens and I force my tongue past his teeth and taste him. Warm, wet...heavenly.
I think I stunned him, but he recovers quickly, lifting me off my feet and crushing his mouth over mine. His tongue makes maddening sweeps over mine and it's better than anything I've ever experienced. The taste of him is amazing. Dark, rich, soothing. I feel his kiss from my lips to the tips of my toes. He takes control by holding me tighter and tilting my head for deeper access into my mouth. His arms grip around my waist and I swing my legs up and around his hips, tired of having my legs dangling in the air. His towel falls to the ground. Oh lord, thank you.
He moves his hands down to my ass cupping me to him, grinding his sex in between our bodies. I moan into his mouth, arousal taking me over. He stops kissing me as he leans his knee on the bed behind me and maneuvers us both onto it, me under him and him fitting nicely between my legs. I unfurl my legs from around his naked form and slide my hands up and down his long frame. He's so much larger in comparison to me. Soft, smooth and utterly male. My sex yearns for him.
His eyes search out mine, "Scully, you need to leave now, I won't be able to stop." His arms are holding him above me and they're shaking unsteadily. His eyes are completely dilated and his erection is straining against my dress slacks, rubbing into my center perfectly.
"Don't stop, Mulder," I pant. "Don't ever stop." His eyes hold mine and he leans in, claiming my lips in a scorching hot kiss. I fear breathing, for it will take his mouth from mine longer than I can handle. His hand comes around my neck. It makes a slow track down my chest, stopping momentarily to squeeze and cup my left breast. "Oh, yes, Mulder." He smiles and moves to kiss my neck, lapping and sucking on the tender skin. I ache to feel his skin against mine. He must want the same thing because as he kisses my neck and nibbles on my ear his hands are making quick work of the buttons on my blouse.
Once the shirt is freed from its buttons, he sits up and flips open the closure on my pants. He's watching my eyes as he disrobes me. There's nothing there but desire and want. He lifts up onto his haunches and pulls my pants down and off, discarding them onto the floor. I'm left under him in nothing but dark satin green panties and bra.
"So beautiful, Scully, you are so beautiful." I blush and it starts from my cheeks and slides down over my chest. He brings up both hands and cups my breasts adoringly. I close my eyes and moan, urging him on. His hands make sweeps all over my chest, abdomen and thighs. He toys with the edges of my panties and hooks his thumbs in the sides. I lift up, once again inviting him to remove them. "Are you sure?" he whispers.
"I've never been more sure of anything in my life." I say it with everything I have in me. I want this, I want him. In my life, as my partner, and in my bed. There's no going back. It's now or never. He looks at me, trying to gauge my answer. I lift my hips once again, making the next course of action evident. He takes the hint and pulls them off. Before tossing them, he nuzzles the satin against his cheek. Oh Christ. He's going to kill me.
I lift up into a sitting position and wrap my hands around his face and kiss him with all the passion and desire I've been storing up for the past several years. He drops the panties and slips his hands around my back, unhooking my bra. It, too, joins the clothes strewn across the floor. Once I'm naked, his hands skim up my back in a feather-light caress. Goose bumps spread throughout my skin. He pulls away from my mouth and leans me back, taking a nipple into the hot warmth of his mouth. He swirls his tongue around the tight peak as he did my burnt thumb a couple days prior. This is so much better, but strikes a burning in my sex that can only be put out by one thing. Him, within me.
I moan into the open room as he grazes the tip with his teeth. I clench my fingers in his hair, keeping his head to my breast. While he lavishes attention on my breast, a hand cups the other and squeezes the tip between his fingers. "Ohhhhhhhh, God, Mullldeeerrr." He smiles against my breast and after a light lick to the tip takes the other one into his mouth giving it the same treatment as the first. Again his fingers clamp over the other one, plucking it and me into a heightened state of arousal. "Mulder, I want...ohhhh, I want you inside me."
He kisses his way up my chest and neck, nipping the side of my jaw, finally coming to my mouth. Our tongues twirl seductively around each other in open-mouthed fashion. His length is rubbing into my center, driving me absolutely insane. I grasp it with my hand, putting pressure on the tender skin underneath the tip. "Fuuuuuccckkkk, Scully." I grin at his remark.
He brings his hands up to cup the sides of my cheeks, his thumb caressing my cheek-bones and lips. Time slows down as he touches my face. He maps out the planes of my features with the tips of his fingers. It feels like gossamer kisses to the tender flesh. His eyes follow each part his fingers touch. I've never in my life felt more cherished than I do at this moment.
"Mulder," I whisper, breaking his trance.
He leans me down on the mattress gently. His elbows lean down on both sides of my head as his hands splay through my hair, cupping my head protectively. "God, Scully..."
"I know, Mulder, I know." He doesn't need to say the words. His actions are showing me everything he struggles to say.
My legs come around his hips as he kisses me languidly. Tongues dancing, lips succumbing to the pull of the other's as our bodies collide. He brings a hand down to cup my left thigh. He raises it higher on his waist as his member prods my sex perfectly. Once aligned, he eases into me, stretching muscles unused for quite some time. His left hand comes down to my right thigh, mimicking the movements of his right. His hands place each thigh high on his waist as he sinks completely into me. My eyes go wide and my mouth opens in awe but no noise comes out.
"Scully, are you okay?" Tears form and slip down the sides of my face. "Scully, Scully," he chants and moves to pull out of me. I clench my legs around him tight, not letting him budge even an inch. I've never had an overwhelming emotional response to sex before. Only him.
"No. Don't,". He settles against me, not moving. His body is surrounding every part of my being, completing me as I always knew he would. I smile wide.
"Scully, talk to me." He sounds scared. He thinks he hurt me. I move my hips back and slam him home. "Oh God," he moans as his forehead comes down onto mine.
"Everything, Mulder," I whisper into his ear. "This is everything." He seems to understand. His hips pull away from me and slide back, setting up the perfect rhythm. "Mmmmmmmmm."
My nails slice down his long back as he thrusts into me. His pelvis is grinding against my clit on each stroke. Without warning, I climax around him. The feeling of him surrounding me is so intense I cry out. He rides out my orgasm until I'm gasping for breath. He's still hard and full within me, unrelenting in his passion. He sits up, keeping his lower half locked to me in a fierce grip. I may have finger shaped bruises on my hips tomorrow. A physical reminder to cherish this moment long after completion.
"God, Scully, you're so beautiful when you come. I need to see it again." Again? My mouth opens in shock as he grips my waist and pounds into me long, deep, and hard. He feels absolutely huge in this position, ramming into me like a jackhammer. It's the most amazing thing I've ever felt. My entire body is atingle and on fire as he pummels me into a
state of sheer pleasure-driven oblivion. It's never, never been this good and through my constant moans I tell him so.
He brings his skilled fingers up to my breasts and pinches them lightly, gauging my response. I moan loudly and a light sheen of sweat breaks on my forehead. He's grunting like a wild animal, gritting his teeth with the exertion. He's trying to hold off his own pleasure, waiting for me. He won't have to wait long. My body is strung tighter than the strings on a guitar.
I've begun chanting his name. "Mulder, Mulder, Mulder." It's the only thing I can mutter through this haze. He squeezes my breasts and tweaks my nipples hard. I scream out to the heavens as another earth-shattering orgasm sweeps over me. It won't stop. I feel as though I'll never stop coming. He rides me hard and I feel him bumping against my cervix, prolonging my orgasm. "Oh Jesus, Mulder," I utter one final time.
"Sccccuuuuuuulllllleeeeeeee," he moans as he spills into me, falling on top of me. I kiss his neck and anything I can reach as his thrusts slow and come to a halt. He's a dead weight lying on me, which I welcome. He's exhausted. Hell, I'm exhausted.
I feel light kisses on the side of my neck as he pants into my ear. "So good. So good, Scully. Wanted you, wanted you for so long," he whispers. I grip his body around mine in a fierce hug. I want every inch of him touching me, sealing him to me and this moment in time, where everything is as it should be.
"No more waiting. Never again," I coo back to him. He lifts his head up and kisses me slowly.
Day 6 - Saturday
Nothing has every felt so fantastic in my entire life. I'm snuggled up to the woman of my dreams, who's sleeping soundly. After our festivities, we were both completely spent. I'm not sure, but I may have even fallen asleep on top of her, but now we're nicely spooned up like baby cats.
Wow, I haven't slept this well in years. I guess being with the right woman does make all the difference. God, and she really is the right woman. She's perfect. Although, if you asked her, she'd beg to differ with you. To me, though, her flaws make her unique and
complement all the things that I am not.
She's moving under me, trying to get me to lift off of her. Oh, but I'm so comfortable. I grumble in response.
"Shower, Mulder. I need to shower." She kisses my temple and slithers out from under my jellied limbs. Her bare ass shimmies away. Scully shimmies. Aw, life is good. She closes the door and it's like a sucker punch to the gut. What the fuck? The pain starts creeping and churning like fire in my belly. No! This is wrong! It's supposed to be gone. I received my heart's desire last night. I know it was her, even Madame FeFe told me it was. That voodoo charming witch. She lied to me.
I jump out of bed and grab the cordless phone, furiously pressing the buttons. Every ring is like a ticking time bomb in my mind. Just answer the fucking phone! I tumble back onto the bed, the phone clutched to my ear. My temples are starting to throb.
"What is it, Mr. Mulder?" How the hell did she know it was me? Whatever. I don't care.
"You lied!" I yell into the phone. She takes a moment to respond. Maybe she's gone deaf. I don't give a flying fuck. "Did you hear me? I said you lied to me!"
"Yes, I heard you. I think you woke my neighbors. Calm down. Now what do you think Madame FeFe lied about, hmmm?" she says sweetly.
"My heart's desire! You said it was Scully. Well, I had her, and the pain is back. Now what the hell did you do to me?" My patience with the woman is quickly dwindling. Not that I had much of it in the first place.
"You had her?" she says, laughing. "Is that what the kiddies are calling it now-a-days?" She chuckles. I wish I could reach into this phone and shake the living shit out of her. She's not understanding.
"You said if I receive my heart's desire, the pain would be gone. It's not gone, and last night I received my heart's desire. What kind of sick game are you playing with me?" I grit out through clenched teeth.
"She admitted her love for you and the pain didn't recede?" she questions worriedly.
"Love? You never said anything about love!" Actually, I didn't even tell her last night how I felt, now that I think about it. Everything happened so fast. We went from fighting to rolling around in the sheets together. The throbbing turns into a full fledge migraine.
Madame Fefe laughs which almost sounds like a cackle through the phone. "Well, of course love is what I was referring to. I never said if you slaked your lust for your pretty partner that the spell would wear off. I specifically said that when you've receive your heart's desire the spell would vanish. It is you who confused the two."
"Christ, woman. Can't you ever give me a straight answer?" I can't deal with this pain. I need Scully. She'll make the pain go away.
"Now, darling, have you told her how you feel? That you are in love with her?" I shake my head no but she seems to know my answer even with my silence. "Tell her. If she feels the same, you'll know it. The pain will be gone. If she doesn't, it will only last one more day." With that she hangs up the phone.
I toss the phone across the room and curl into a fetal position. I feel damp hands on my shoulder blades suddenly. "Mulder, Mulder, oh...are you sick again?"
I nod my head up and down. She lays her cool hands over my heated forehead and again it acts like a healing balm. The phone I threw starts beeping and the operator's voice can be heard "If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try your call again." Scully goes over to the phone, turns it off and puts it back on the cradle.
"Who did you call?"
"Madame FeFe. The pain returned and I wanted to know why. I thought that we took care of this problem last night." Her eyes gaze down and she looks sullen, removed, sad. "Scully?"
"I had hoped your problem would be gone as well." She's not looking at me. She stands up, removes her towel and slips into one of my dress shirts. That shirt has never looked so good.
"Scully, look at me." She won't, so I grab her wrist, bring myself to a seated position and haul her into my lap. "Scully..." I grip her chin and lift her face to mine. She's crying. Now look what you've done, you bastard. You've made the only woman you've ever truly loved cry. Just tell her you idiot. "Are you interested in hearing what she said about my condition?"
She nods her head. "Of course I am, Mulder. I'm sorry. It's silly; I have no reason to be crying." She sniffs and places her forehead against mine. "What did she say?"
"She said that my heart's desire was not going to bed with you." She looks up, defeated, and tries to remove herself from my lap. "No!" I grip her to me in a fierce hug.
"Mulder, let me go." She's struggling against me.
"Listen to me. Just stop and let me finish!" Her body comes to a halt, slumping against me in a lifeless hug. "What I was trying to tell you is that my lust for you is not what breaks the spell. It's what I feel for you." Her body comes to life again and she lifts her head, looking into my eyes.
"What do you feel?" It comes out as a soft whisper. She's scared of my response but she needn't be.
"How could you not know?"
She looks at me, confused. "Tell me, please, Mulder."
"I love you, Scully. I have for so long--" Before I can finish she kisses me. She's relentless, putting everything into this kiss. She pulls away and we're both left panting.
"I hoped, Mulder..." she breathes, "but I never dared dream it was true," she confides through her hitching breath and glassy eyes.
"Scully, but I need to know. How you..."
"Oh God, Mulder, I love you." She kisses my lips lightly. "I think I always have." Another kiss on my cheeks, then my eyebrows. "You crept your way into my heart so long ago," kiss to my forehead, "it's been second nature to deny my feelings." She leans her forehead against mine in that endearing way she has.
A huge weight has been lifted from my heart, my mind and my soul. Scully loves me. She always has? I'll never wrap my mind around it. I clutch her to me, hugging her like never before.
"Scully, no more hiding." She pulls away from me and nods her head.
"No more hiding," she reiterates my sentiment.
"See, it was you." He smiles up at me and I can't get the grin off my face. He loves me.
"What was me?" I answer, confused. I feel like the last few days have been such a whirlwind of knee-jerk reactions, misunderstandings, fear and regret.
"My heart's desire," he says simply. I knit my eyebrows together. "Your love. That's all I've ever wanted. You're my heart's desire." I'm trying very hard not to cry but failing miserably. I've never had a man make me feel this way. Up, down completely turned all around, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.
"I love you, Mulder."
"And I you." He leans in and kisses me. His tongue swirls around mine seductively and it feels as though I'm falling. I am falling, he's leaning us back on the bed. His hands slide up my thighs and curve around my ass, squeezing rhythmically.
"Mmmmmmmm", I groan into his mouth as his hands remove the buttons on his shirt and slide it down my back. He brings his head up and mouths, licks and nips at my exposed shoulder. The movement sends a jolt through my body, landing in my lower half. I grind into him, relieving some of the pressure.
"Sccuuulllleeeeee," he moans in response. That's right. I'm going to give this man, my man, everything I have. No holding back. I giggle as I think of him as "my man" and he takes the lack of movement to roll us over, pinning me under him. He brings both my hands up and locks them in one of his. Oh, he plays dirty. Well, I'll just have to struggle a little. I grin at him evilly, lock my legs around his waist and flip us over with the strength in my thighs. Thank you, thigh-master.
"Whoa, Scully. Girl, you've got moves I've never seen before!" He laughs heartily.
"Don't you forget it!" I claim his mouth as mine and proceed to show him exactly what moves he's been missing out on.
No more waiting...no more hiding...no more being alone.
Day 7 - Sunday
She swirls her hand around the crystal ball. "Aw, so it looks like you received what it is you were looking for." A picture of a tall, dark-haired man and a petite fiery-haired woman rolling around kissing and enjoying themselves plays out over the glass.
She knew it was wrong, but she did it anyway. She'd never feel guilty about the shove she gave those two. It might not have been conventional, but the future was looking rather bleak for them when they first stepped into her shop. Now...well, now they're going to get something they've never believed was possible, and they won't believe the truth. She snickers to herself and turns away. The vision of the two bodies intertwined vanishes.
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Cybill
|Home/QuickSearch + Categories + Schedule + Rules + FAQ + Links/Lists + Contact|